Banner Day

Today was a big day in my baby's life. Evan took his first steps today! He's been so close for a while, but every time I tried to let go of his hands he would sit down. Today he purposefully took a few steps to me. He repeated his new trick for me, then for big brother Zachary, then for Daddy. Later tonight we had Kurt, Denise, and Joanne over for family dinner night and he walked more for them. This is such an exciting time!

It's been such a great weekend. After a weeklong toothache, teaching extra, and having Ryan gone, the weekend really turned out great. Ryan got home Friday night and I had a pizza waiting for him. We played with the kids and then put them to bed. Then, Ace and Suz came over for a game of dominoes. We had such a fun time laughing with our friends. I kicked all their asses at dominoes! Saturday I took the boys shoe shopping. Zachary needed some tennis shoes for tennis camp next week, and Evan needed some walking shoes. I'm sure his new shoes got the ball rolling for Evan! Saturday night Ryan and I went out to dinner and to see the new Harry Potter movie. It wasn't a terribly eventful weekend, but it was so pleasant. Then again, I guess it was pretty eventful - Evan is now officially a toddler!

Good Lies Make Good Neighbors

It's been a long day. I had to take Evan to the Pediatrician for his one year well check. Since everyone in town goes to this same doctor, I had to be there early so I wouldn't be there all day. It meant I had to be showered, dressed, hair and makeup done and out the door at 7:45 a.m. Oh, yeah, and Evan needed to be fed and dressed as well. That was a challenge!

The day didn't slow down. During Evan's afternoon nap Zachary and I went to the driving range. It was quite crowded. Zachary pulled out his driver and proclaimed "It's time to let the big dog eat" which drew tons of laughter from the other golfers. That kid is too much. Anyway, all day long I knew I needed to think of something to cook for dinner. I still have a horrible toothache, so nothing was exciting me too much. I do, however, need to feed my kids dinner.

Evan slept late, I went upstairs to get him up at 4:15, planning on changing clothes and taking the kids to the grocery store. The second I got undressed, as it always happens, the doorbell rings and someone knocks furiously on the front door. It was one of the new neighborhood kids, age 3 1/2, and his father. The child and his older brothers (ages 8 & 9) have been over before, but this was the first time I'd met the father. He seemed nice enough so I invited him in while the kids started playing. Zachary was happy to have a friend over and the new neighbor was chatty. Then the father asked if he could leave his kid with me for a couple of hours so he could get some work done (my mind did this quick rewind thing and I realize he'd been setting me up with his story about how much he had to do and couldn't get done today, blah blah blah).

*Now let me interrupt the story for a minute to say I do not mind playdates, I rather enjoy them. I like having kids playing at my house. It allows me to monitor the play and keep Evan on his nap schedule. I prefer these types of things planned instead of just dumped on me.

So I smiled and said I would love to have him stay but the kids and I were going out for dinner. I further explained that we eat dinner early. I told him of my reputation as the schedule nazi of the neighborhood. He chuckled and said he thought schedules were good, but they have 5 kids and no real schedule anymore. Just as I suspected, if I hadn't come up with my little lie (that was only sort of a lie) I'm sure our new friend would still be here at bedtime.

So, after they left I packed the kids up in the car and we went to Dee's for dinner. Everything turned out much better than I imagined. I got grilled Mahi. Evan ate some Mahi, collard greens, mashed potatoes, lima beans, and sweet potato fries. Zachary ate Mahi, collard greens, and sweet potato fries. I brought along some pears for the kids, so they got fish, veggies, and a little fruit. And I got beer. Not too bad considering I procrastinated and didn't cook a thing.

Both kids were all smiles at dinner, something that hasn't happened in a while. During dinner the Ray Charles version of "Hit the Road, Jack" came on. I sang that once in the car to Zachary a while back, so when it came on his eyes lit up. We sang and laughed. Then he asked why they didn't want Jack to come back no more no more no more no more. I told him Jack wasn't very nice to his friends. Then he asked why Jack was being mean. I launched into another song by saying he was having a "Bad Day" - the opening song in the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie. That got Evan giggling, which got Zachary giggling, and nothing melts my heart like watching my children laugh.

We got home a little late, and the kids got to bed a little late, but it was a glorious end to a long day.

Evan's Birth Story

A year ago at this time I was bonding with my newborn Evan in the hospital. It was a whirlwind labor and delivery. Here is Evan's birth story.

I found out I was pregnant in November, the day of the hospital Gala. Ryan was the co-chair of the event, so we were at the head table. There was an open bar and several bottles of wine on our table for dinner. I was nervous because obviously I didn't want to drink, but it would be conspicuous if I didn't. I wasn't ready to tell anyone, since I was just barely 4 weeks pregnant, so I consumed a "mocktail" - a mixture of Cranberry juice and water with a lime. It looked enough like a drink, and all night long Ryan kept a full "drink" in my hands so no one had a clue. During dinner he swapped wine glasses with me twice so it would appear I was drinking my wine. It was a wonderful night. Ryan celebrated our good news by surprising me with a hotel suite and roses at the end of the night.

My pregnancy progressed without incident, thankfully. I was working a lot, teaching 4 days a week. It was difficult teaching bellydance, since I usually just wear a bra top and yoga pants, and my waist disappeared virtually overnight. I finally announced my pregnancy after Christmas. It was such an exciting time. I added a prenatal yoga/Pilates class in February. It was such fun sharing my pregnancy with my students.

In the weeks surrounding my due date I enrolled Zachary in a summer program at his preschool. My due date came and went and, although I didn't gain as much weight as I did with Zachary, I was huge and uncomfortable. The day I went into labor I had been to my OB and he swept my membranes. I knew labor was imminent. I went to pick up Zachary from his summer program. I was talking to another Mom in the parking lot, telling of my visit to the OB. She asked if I was feeling any contractions, ironically that was the moment my contractions began. It was 12:45 p.m.

I went home, not sure if my contractions were the real thing. I remember sitting at the table having lunch and Ryan suggested he and Zachary go out on the little boat so I could take a nap. Realizing that my contractions were beginning to come regularly, I politely vetoed that prospect. I called my labor doula when my contractions were 5 minutes apart. She arrived around 3:30 p.m. We labored together in my bedroom while Ryan and Zachary played downstairs. The contractions started getting intense, so Kathy, my labor doula, ran some hot water and put my in the tub. My water broke while I was in the tub at 4:30. Then contractions really started coming fast and furious. Kathy gently encouraged me to get dressed so we could get to the hospital. The problem was I didn't want to move until between contractions and there was no 'in between' contractions. We left for the hospital 20 minutes later, it was almost 5:00 p.m. and we had to cross the bridge into town! I was in transition 8-10 cm dilation, while in the car. That was the hardest part of my labor. We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 p.m. Kathy gave them the important information, Ryan held my hand My OB came in and never left the room, Evan was born at 6:15 p.m.

I cannot believe it's been a year!

Great Expectations

They say that expectations hinder truly living in the moment.

Tomorrow is Evan's first birthday. We had a small family party yesterday. It wasn't quite as elaborate as Zachary's first birthday party. When Zachary was turning one we were in an established playgroup. I wanted to have a big party for Evan, but it didn't seem right to invite Zachary's friends for another party so soon. So we had a small family party.

Evan's nickname is "the duck." When we play cards with our friends they refer to the 2 card as the duck, and Evan is #2 kid, hence the nickname. So I thought a Duck themed party would be perfect for his first birthday. So I got an entirely too large custom made duck cake for Evan.

Evan had his own cake to destroy, but the bagger at Publix did a pretty good job of that himself.

The whole day just didn't happen quite like I expected. Evan is cutting FOUR molars all at the same time, he's had a low grade fever since Friday. Yesterday his misery was just compounded by a virus. It was his party and he could cry if he wanted to, I suppose. His low grade fever became a serious one by late afternoon. My dog got sick and began puking everywhere. Lovely. Then the overpriced, gigantic custom made duck cake fell apart. The tail literally fell off. I didn't get a picture because Evan was getting clingy and wouldn't let me put him down. And did I mention my nagging toothache? I found out today I need a root canal.

Evan didn't enjoy his cake too much, but he did have his moments. He liked his presents. This was from Zachary.

Zachary likes helping Evan play with his ball popper.

Happy Birthday, my little duck, I hope you're feeling better tomorrow!

The Joy of the Second Child

Having Evan was a huge surprise for Ryan and me. We were delighted to finally complete our family. It was quite the adjustment, and at times it has been quite difficult. But as we close in on Evan's first birthday I can happily say I cannot imagine my life without him. Like his big brother, he's been such a joy to me.

When Zachary was a baby I was quite high strung. (Shocking, I know) I didn't want anyone to hold him, even Ryan. I was convinced no one could care for him like I could. I finally learned to relax a bit and let others help me take care of him. I had to - exhaustion set in eventually! With Evan I've been a bit more relaxed from the start. I still have my moments, zen is a learned experience for me. However, I have accepted help (and needed it) from the beginning. I do secretly harbor that thought that no one can care for my kids like I can, but I try not to say it out loud!

Last weekend we went to Ryan's Uncle Mike and Aunt Linda's house in Atlanta to celebrate the 4th of July. It's an annual tradition and a family reunion. I was quite nervous about managing two children, but everything turned out surprisingly well. Various relatives would just gather Evan up and take him outside for a walk or whatever to give me a break. It was heavenly. There were times I didn't know what to do with myself! It's funny that I didn't even panic or worry, which never would have happened with Zachary. Everytime anyone wanted to take Zachary away from me I would either follow them, hovering nearby like a helicopter, or endlessly fret until my baby was returned to me. I realize now what a waste of energy that was. Now I relish the moments that my family chooses to spend with my children.

So thank you, Evan, for teaching me to let go. It's such a joy to go down this path again, this time with a little experience. I'm looking forward to your first steps (any day now . . .), your first birthday, and all the other wonderful firsts I get to experience with you. I love you!